when you like something alot, nowadays, you go out on the internet, and you search for information about it. i don't know if this has happened to anyone else, but i find that when i do find fan sites/pages/bulletin boards/mailing lists, i get so appalled at the people on them that i feel ashamed for being so fannish. one example is this: when i was in college, i used to get on IRC and also subscribed to a mailing list on the monkees. i was a huge monkees fan, bought the box sets and videos and blah blah blah, but then one time i went to california, to catch up with some of the people i met on IRC and see the kickoff of the most recent (at that time) reunion show. when i did see the unbridled and frightening adulation and even the scary competition between the fans, i was suddenly turned off from the collecting and the desire that i had experienced previously. since that time in my life, i've been less a "fan" of things in general and specifically less enthusiastic about following the latest monkees news. just now, i had a much milder experience visiting the royaltenenbaums community. i just found myself thinking, why am i looking at this? admittedly, it had some information, but i had to ask myself, why am i compelled to find groups of other people who enjoy what i enjoy on the internet?
perhaps this is a very foolish question.