i have about a million phone calls to make right now, but i just have to take time to take note of the past 12 hours' or so events. i will start at the end by saying MY *&^@ *@&#^*%^ CAR HAS BEEN TOTALED AGAIN. on the way home from nation last night i was hit by a possibly drunk driver in rockville. he was a little surprised when i jumped out of my car and started screaming, "THIS IS NOT FUCKING HAPPENING AGAIN FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!" there are many worst parts to this scenario, i am not sure where to even begin with them. having to find another car to buy, having to call a million people, having to have gone through the drunk test myself in the middle of the street, having to relive this awful feeling of what could i have done to prevent this??? over and over, being extremely sore, having my knees bruised and my thumb burned AGAIN exactly like last time, having to go to some tow lot to take my belongings out of my poor, sad, dead little car... the list goes on and on. every time i think about it at all i begin to laugh and cry at the same time. at least this time it was in no way my fault and they took the guy away in cuffs. i'm not sure why but i guess it will say on the police report. at least i can say that i think the ford aspire (oh my poor little car!!!! it just passed emissions!!!!) is a very safe car to get in an accident in.

there was a good part to my night. in fact i would venture to say it was the best night i ever had at nation. i was there for the very beginning of the Damned show, and it was AWESOME. i was right up front, only 2 feet away from Dave Vanian!!! he is everything i hoped, he is the goth elvis god. i worship. the opening band, tiger army, wasn't too bad either, in a punk way i guess. not that i want to throw that word around, having no cred with which to do that whatsoever. anyways, the damned have added a female bassist, i think she is dave's woman, and she is THE BOMB. she is incredible. i was completely stoked after hearing most of the set and i wandered off to let someone else get battered by crowd surfers.

i found out that several old friends were at the club, people i haven't seen in YEARS. jay looked so awesome and freakeden did too and it was so great to see them. in addition to that, jack informed me that i may have flipped the dancing switch on him so now he likes dancing. this makes me happy. it was such a good night. and the real irony of all this is that i was really really worried about jack getting home, in fact i was thinking all the way back of all these horrible horrifying scenarios of him calling me telling me he'd been in an accident. and then i ended up calling him. what a mess. what a terrible mess. and i had such a wonderful night, too. it's a damn shame. oh well, i better get my ass in gear and make more phone calls to sort all this out. and a doctor's appointment. dammit.