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Rant: S2

Once again, I have thought, "Gee, maybe I should just try this S2 style thing" and once again, I have come away angry and mean like a cobra.

I was looking at oontzgrrl's awesome layout, which she told me she found from a kind (unemployed/teenaged I assume) soul in freelayouts. After spending about 15 minutes there going "WTF" I thought maybe this was time to again consider making it work for myself. I don't want anything fancy... or so I thought. I knew that geniealisa had customized her layout, so I thought I will ask her.

I really only want a few things:

1. A nice, unique, high quality picture to base the theme around. (I know... this requires photoshop knowledge. Separate issue.)

2. Comments links that MAKE FUCKING SENSE and are readable and findable. None of this "I have to a) find out where the FUCK they put the link THIS fucking time and b) interpret your secret language to know which one is "post a fucking comment". (style=mine takes care of this on other people's journals or I would have stopped commenting on half your journals by now)

3. Comments threaded in colors and separated by enough space (left to right as the thread goes on) that you can tell, visually, how deep you are in the thread, and who the person is responding to.

4. Some featured links along with the standard UserInfo/Calendar/Friends links at the top.

5. That tags thing everyone has where the frequency of use determines the size of the word in the cloud.

Fancy, outside things that would also be cool:
The last 4 or so Flickr pics I posted to flickr.
The last 4 or so Twitter entries.
Maybe even the public entries on my google calendar.

That's all!!! Since I already had 2 & 3 going for me and I didn't want to fuck that up, I have avoided S2 like the plague, but then every once in a while I get a burr up my butt to have my front page look different and be a little more personalized and of course then I have to consider S2. Genie pointed out that it took her some time and effort to make the additional, outside things happen, so I have kind of given up on those for now.

But just to do the regular stuff that I assume that LJ provides since so many of you are displaying them, why is this so hard? I read up to here in the S2 guide and I was happy. It is all "CLICK HERE AND TYPE THIS HERE" which is what I need to know. BUT! Then it's like, "WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAMBO DOGFACED TO THE BANANA PATCH?" and I got fucking mad. Why get me to that point only to make me feel like a total fucking moron for the next 4 chapters of your document? Ugh.

So. Am I just a moron? If you are thinking, "sheez, that's easy, why is she being so stupid" please TELL ME so I can just get over it now and keep trying because I know if I knock my head against something long enough it will eventually make sense to me? Or force someone to sit at a computer with me and hold my hand? Or is there another, better, document that actually tells me to click here and type this there? Or should I just leave Phil in shades of grey well enough alone because NO ONE even GOES to http://snidegrrl.livejournal.com/ anyways??

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Comments

( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
oontzgrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:01 pm (UTC)
S2 is a royal pain in the ass to code which is why I get my layouts from layout communities. You're not a moron.
snidegrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:04 pm (UTC)
I just want to click and drop. Like, "pick this, put it here. enter links here." It was WAY fucking easier to change up my myspace profile! It was a cake walk!! And think about Facebook. If I want the little thing that shows all my other web presences, I just drag it where I want it. SO EASY.
oontzgrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:10 pm (UTC)
Yeah. Back when it was all S1 I would change up my layouts by playing around with html which took a lot of time and I am lazy. S2 code is...special. And again, I am lazy. Most people on the layout communities just change around CSS and you can copy that code into the CSS section of the s2 modify journal blicky which is what I tend to do. I'm not certain that you'll be able to integrate most of the tools like flickr and all onto your LJ layout. Or if there is a way you'd probably have to write your own s2 code.

Now for issues 1 and 2, you may just want to try playing around with the custome options tools for s2 because it really is just a bunch of pull down stuff, and I believe you can make your comment links say whatever you damn well want them too. :)
snidegrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:13 pm (UTC)
Probably in a day or so after I cool down I will just switch to S2 and see what happens. I might be able to get 1 or 2 more things the way I want them. Then I will post a scathing rant about photoshop while I try to get my perfect image. :)
oontzgrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:15 pm (UTC)
Hahaha I seriously want to take a class on photoshop. Not like a semester long college thing. Just like a seminar type class so I can stop being a moron.
snidegrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:21 pm (UTC)
I second this - I feel like a whole world is available right on the other side of this door. On this door is the words: "Simple Shit about Photoshop You'd Never Know Without a Personal Photoshop Trainer That Makes Shit Look Awesome Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, or, Like Those Thirteen Year Olds Do".
oontzgrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 10:58 pm (UTC)
My parents took a class like that. It was a week long and they came out of it photoshop mastahs. Then they forgot a lot or at least told me they did when I begged them to teach me. :)
snidegrrl
Oct. 3rd, 2007 01:26 pm (UTC)
Photoshop bullshit is made of oil. It slips right out of your mind. I can't tell you how many techniques I've learned that have disappeared.
omphaloskepsis
Oct. 3rd, 2007 06:18 am (UTC)
On this door is the words: "Simple Shit about Photoshop You'd Never Know Without a Personal Photoshop Trainer That Makes Shit Look Awesome Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, or, Like Those Thirteen Year Olds Do".
This gave me a much needed laugh today because it is sooo very true!
snidegrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:14 pm (UTC)
Oh, and I don't even want my comments to say something other than "Reply to this" or "post a comment" or whatever. Nothing makes me more irritated than having to mouse over tiny symbols to see if it says "?replyto" or "mode=reply"in the URL. I seriously hulk out and scare the cats.
oontzgrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:16 pm (UTC)
I agree. I hate the emo shit where it's like "cry with me?" "20 tears" or what not. It makes me want to kick things.
snidegrrl
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:20 pm (UTC)
HAHAHA yes exactly. I mean, to each their own, but if you make it so fucking hard for me to comment, I guess I just won't then. Having a standard is helpful for a reason!!!
seraphsmorgan
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:41 pm (UTC)
Check this out: http://www.createblog.com/

Might have some ideas you can use/translate into what you need.
snidegrrl
Oct. 3rd, 2007 01:25 pm (UTC)
Ooh - they even have some S1 styles that look nice and I might be able to gank their code. Thanks!
mikailborg
Oct. 2nd, 2007 10:03 pm (UTC)
"WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAMBO DOGFACED TO THE BANANA PATCH?"

"... Give that kid a special test. Get him out of here."
snidegrrl
Oct. 3rd, 2007 01:25 pm (UTC)
*hi5s*
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )